I have been scared of animals and birds for as long as I can remember. But I gave into that fear when we brought home 4 chickens three years ago. I was terrified of holding them and petting them only under supervision. But I loved them fiercely right from day one when they were barely little chicks and I cooked them spaghetti (that they wouldn't eat). She was the first chick we picked at the big coop. She was Mario, layer of double yolk eggs, leader of the pack, fearless and beautiful.
Three weeks ago she stopped eating and drinking. We thought she was broody at first but gave her medicine and probiotics anyways. In just a couple of days, she went from bad to worse. Three days after first realizing there was something wrong with her because she wouldn't leave her nest, the vet declared that she had a tumor and that the invasive surgery would be painful and she would still not make it. We had to make the most gut-wrenching decision of putting her to sleep. Never in a million years had I expected to feel such violent grief for the loss of a bird I was too scared to touch. Love is weird like that. RIP Mario. You will always live in our hearts. I will miss you dearly!! Our first chick. Leader of the pack.
It has been three weeks and the random tearing up has finally reduced. I often find myself wandering out to where the makeshift grave marker composed of fallen gum branches still stands undeterred. The petals have long blown away, the mound of dirt the only indication that she was no longer looking up at me through the window while I worked at my desk. A week after she was gone, I cracked my last double yolk egg and instantly gave in to deep sobs.
Earlier this morning when I went to collect the eggs, I choked up but didn't cry. It is getting better. In time, we will be ready to bring two more chickens into our coop. But until then, the mound of dirt is a fixation with my cup of tea every evening. Life goes on, no matter how strange it can be. And I feel grateful for the chance to live it, surrounded by the people I love and wonders to be discovered every single day. Thank you all for your warm messages and comments. Thank you for sharing stories of your beloved pets, past and present. Your words mean the world to me.
Poor Mario, she was such a handsome chooken. Very sorry for your loss, Sneh. The loss of a treasured pet is devastating, it's remarkable how much of an impact they have on our day to day lives.
Thank you for the links, especially the succulent planters. That is going straight to the top of the list of DIY projects.
Animals are like children: They aren't prejudice and love unconditionally.
My husband is still talking about wanting to keep chickens in our backyard.
What an endearing post. Mario was lucky to have your family to care for him.
Putting him to sleep was the kindest way to go.
Animals really do become part of the family, even if they are a chicken. I am so sorry to hear about Mario's departing. Massive hug your way.
so sorry for your loss, Sneh. such a sweet tribute to celebrate Mario's life. xoxo
Dear Sneh, you poor things. I'm so sorry! We have been there and I know how heartbreaking it is. Chickens are pets like any other. x
So sorry, Sneh :/ it's funny how I am so used to having chicken around that they are a presence I take for granted. I never thought of them as pets - definitely your posts sheds some new light on those funny animals.
Thank you so much for including me in your weekly reads!
So sorry about your chook, Sneh. Sending you hugs.
I know what you are going through.
I had a bird when we were kids: a bulbul that had fallen out from its nest. It was so tame! Never ever are bird seeds, but pecked at whatever we ate. Flew around our tiny Bombay apartment (had to close the sliding windows). I was heart-broken when it passed away after eight years with us. My friends from college were at my home when he died and could not understand why my entire family was sobbing uncontrollably!
Oh, dear Sney.
My heart breaks for you and your words made me cry. I had alittle hen called Becky such a long time ago and i too loved her dearly. She was such a lovely companion in the garden, always following me around and clucking all the while. She laid beautiful golden eggs but we had to be quick to get them or my lovely dog, Diggety would get the freshly laid egg first. Fond memories. And chickens make lovely pets.
I always cry forever over all my lost pets.
Take care. Lots of love, Jane
Shared tears with You today!
Its no surprise we feel such connection to all of the sentient beings we sure our planet with!!!! We ARE One!
And once an animal touches our Lives we are family of a sort!!!
Wishing You and easier time of mounting... it WILL take time...
Love and Light
Lyn~
We lost one of our girls a couple of weeks ago now. In the post where I farewelled her, I wrote -
"With all that said, there are 5 other chickens in the yard for whom life continues. They live minute by minute, sucking the most joy out of each and every moment, whether it is a dirt bath, finding a bug, eating a treat from the humans.. all we can do is love them while they’re here, protect them the best we can from predators, know when it is time to let them go, and remember them when they are gone."
We can learn a lot from chickens, the first and most important thing, to live in the moment, enjoy the now.
She was only one chook but for some reason without her the chook yard seems incredibly empty. The chook auction at Berry is coming up this month, and we'll be going along to see if any chickens speak to us. If not, it is still a great day out. 🙂
Oh Sneh, I'm so sorry for your loss - that's awful. As my mom likes to say, "animals are people, too." I lost a feline friend years ago and I still dream about him regularly. My heart is with you. Many thanks, also, for linking to my recipe. I'm looking forward to discovering those cookbooks, too.
I've always felt an acute sense of sadness when losing a favourite chicken. It's amazing how they become part of the family. What a lovely send off for Mario.
xx
I had a favourite chicken that was so sweet and always was first out the gate when I took them our of their big pen for a walk through the garden to get their feast of bugs. One 40+ degree day she was suffering heat stress and I sprinkled water on her to cool her down. It sent her into shock and she died. I was devastated.
The next day I bought an evaporative cooler and put it outside the pen so the girls could cool off if they needed to. My husband thought I was a total idiot. I have no regrets.
I'm so sorry, Sneh! It is never easy to lose something that we love or that brings us joy. Hoping the pain continues to ease leaving you with your cherished memories!
Sorry to hear about the loss of Mario.
Oh Sneh, I'm so sorry to hear about your loss! It's remarkable how much pets become a part of our lives...and if I can say anything comforting, it's that they never really leave us as long as we remember them.